Jananyaaha Prema- Mathru (period of new transition and realization)

 

It was around 1.45 am, an odd hour , I woke up. I started feeling very uncomfortable. I was getting severe backpain and felt as if I am going to leave my last breathe with this pain. Well I was in my 39th week just 2 days before my due date that night. Unfortunately everyone in the family were out for a family function and  dozed off little time before.

I could understand nothing , could not move , I shouted in pain.  This was my second pregnancy but my experience was new. My first one was quite complicated and I had a C-section. Obviously I was prepared and ready for that. Slowly my mother got up and said these might be the contraction and you are into labor. My feet got trembling , all the nervousness and anxiety filled my body and brain. My sibling and my spouse arranged a cab for the hospital. Well the hospital was little far and it was  raining , which added to my anxiousness. Slowly we reached hospital in  around 60-65 min. Gynae checked me , said I was into labor and I might have VBAC. I could not digest this. In my first pregnancy which was complicated and ruined my health normal delivery was impossible. My mom was very happy and I could clearly observe her happiness. With the support of midwives and doctors I had a safe , healthy and normal delivery with my 3.5 kgs little one out. I had a great experience and was happy back home. It took 4 months for me to recover after my first C-section and very little time after my second delivery. 

Today is mother's day and I have nothing more to dedicate this blog for her.

My mother played a very strong role in my nourishment , empowering me and making me stand for myself every time. She incepted the idea of independence in me. I was educated , I had good facilities , good food and I could spend on all my expenses on my own.  After being independent and having all sorts of facilities I still crave for more. 

As a child I observed my mother never had any desires to have delicious foods or stylish clothes. She sacrificed all her desires only for me and my siblings. I remember her sometimes laughing at me and saying , you crave for lot of food but I even suffered to get two meals a day under my mother-in-law. She was only 17 when I was born as her first child and at 21 she had my siblings too. I observed her suffering from domestic violence under a joint family with three kids and hell lot of work to do.

 Those were the days when our family was going through bad financial crisis  and my dad was completely hopeless where he brought a vendor to sell our house. 

I still remember my mother saying - " I would live with one saree for 10 years and one meal till my last breathe please ask him to get out of the house" . I was only 9 years when I over heard these words. 

Our School was near by and we walked home for lunch daily at 12.30pm . One day when I was in my second standard , me and my siblings came home for lunch. Our house was locked. We were hungry , we could do nothing so went back to school and came home at 3.30 pm  after school. 

My mother was cooking lunch then. I asked mom ! where have you been ? She said , have food will discuss later. My dad had no money so he could not see us hungry and he went to some temple. My mother walked around 15kms to her sister's house to borrow 50 rupees and came back 15 kms on her foot, as she could not see us hungry.   

My school bag was torn out and all my friends were teasing me . I shouted I don't want to go to school , she simply took an old blanket and stitched a bag which lasted for around 5 years , though I got teased for bag I carried , I never took them to heart .  She stitched buttons and hooks under a tailor for bluses and shirts , the whole year and saved money only to get me a new dress  and few chocolates for my classmates on my birthday. 

There are many sacrifices made by our mothers which we might not know. As we are mothers today we should never forgot our patience would indulge lot of positive attitude in our kids. I am really fortunate that I was elder child and I could observe all my mothers sacrifices. Today I am strong ,I can buy my desired clothes  , get n number of bags for my kids and feed them all kinds of food. But every time I purchase any of the things my mothers spontaneousness and her creativity to handle our desires comes into my mind. 

She might not be able to read  or understand this but I wanted to put her efforts on writings . There is nothing which can replace her Mathru Prema. 

While we become mothers and enjoy motherhood , We go through transition. 

But when we put our parents in our children's place we actually realize they are kids , after all they we looking after us , feeding us , cleaning our potty and making us strong everyday.

Nothing can replace her -"THE MOTHER" . Anyone can be good , bad, better, best or worst. 

But Mother is always a mother neither pre phrased with good or bad and her love for us is eternal.